As I come to the end of the year and begin to reflect what this year has taught me, I am, quite frankly, glad to be done with 2014. This year has been hard on me, spiritually. I have been under attack from Satan himself since early this year. I am hoping that 2015 will be a far better year with far better results by December 31. I’m happy that God creates a new year every year! 

But, 2014 has had some good lessons and I would like to share with you what 2014 has taught me as I have gone through my good times and my hard times.

1.       Life is down right hard! I know that you are probably going, “Well duh, Monica!” But remember, I’ve been spoiled by the military since getting married and before that, I was under my parents wings. Since Nathan got out of the military in August and started a new job, the bills are even worst (by that I mean we’re not getting paid the bonuses the military adds on top of every paycheck). And we’re learning all sorts of things about insurance. I freakin’ hate insurance. I want my TriCare! This is why I feel like life was so hard after Nathan got out of the USAF. However, I am very proud that he tried something so different and seems to be enjoying his civilian life.

2.      Starting your own business is VERY time consuming! Another “Duh” moment, but I don’t think anyone ever tells you how time consuming and hard it is! When I first took off with my freelancing, I was thinking I would be filing invoices and work. Nope. I had to read up about taxes, what to charge, how to file according to section C in my taxes, where to place myself on and off line, where to network, how to network and the list goes on. I had to ask myself what types of social media am I going to get on, what are some things I can try new, how can I get paid right now, how long potential projects will take, and the list goes on. I don’t think you know this, but the work I put into my freelance business, including social media, is between 20-30 hours a week. I am CONSTANTLY working on it in some form, fashion, way, sign, light, and any other word you can think of.

3.      Marriage is tough. Tougher than I could have ever believed. It’s hard learning to love someone you’re not forced to love (come on, we all know our parents forced us to love our siblings). It’s hard dealing with someone with the opposite mind set as you. It’s hard putting Christ into the center of your relationship. I have learned the awful being named Pride. Pride loves to come out and show its ugly head in my life. I am trying to put pride down, which is a lesson I’ll forever be doing.

4.      Despite marriage being hard, I learned some hard lessons on forgiveness, whether it’s my spouse or someone else. I can honestly say I have a firmer grasp on WHY I should forgive. I shall be blogging about this sometime in early 2015, but I know as a believer what Christ did for me, and quite frankly, Christ expects me to forgive others just as He forgave me (Ephesians 4:31-32).

5.      I’ve learned that being a wife has a whole different meaning than what I even thought two years ago. Being a wife means showing my husband love, compassion, mercy, grace, and forgiveness regardless if I think he deserves it or not. Being a wife means I have a godly duty to respect my husband despite my feelings. Feelings are not truth all the time; God’s Word is truth. This is what God has called me to do and I need to respect my husband because this is honoring God.

6.      I have also learned that I am only responsible for my own actions because God has called me to a standard and I am to follow that standard. I am not responsible for the way anyone else acts or speak. I have to make sure my heart is in the right place because that is what I will be judged on one day.

7.      I have learned that sex is not just “sex”. Sex is a God-given Holy Communion between my husband and I. God created sex HOLY. God has also given me permission to be FREE with sex with my husband. God has also given me boundaries on the topic of sex which you can read about in Passion Pursuit. This, to me, is pretty cool because I think so many people never realize how important sex is to a husband and wife nor do they realize how holy sex is according to God.

8.     I’ve learned that I am claustrophobic. Maybe I should have figured it out a long time ago, but apparently it just dong on me this year that I am claustrophobic. I figured this out by watching a movie of people crawling in some vents and they were trying to get away from someone or something (I can’t remember). I remember holding my breath and feeling stressed. That is when it hit me, “I’m claustrophobic!” This will explain why I’ve always hated elevators – despite the fact they are death boxes.

9.      I’ve learned that Satan will attack marriages the hardest. I heard it said recently that since marriage is the closest example of the way God sees us and want us to be with Him, that is why Satan attacks it the most.

10.   I’ve also learned that my husband is NOT my enemy. Satan is. Since learning this, I can look past the argument or the situation and see Satan in the midst. Sadly this does not help stop an argument (thank you pride), but it helps me give out more grace and compassion on my spouse. It helps me see his battle and what’s going on inside of him and Satan is making it worst with an argument or the situation.

11.   I truly believe this year has taught me to look at the little things in life and praise God for it. I almost feel like this year’s battles and bright moments have been half and half. Honestly, I cannot see the good outweighing the bitter moments. But what I have seen is that God is constantly helping me see the little things – the baby steps – and praising Him for it. I do get caught up in my own bitter world, but He reminds me (sometimes through a friend) of His faithfulness and His grace. I have to force myself to say, “Praise You O God!” Because my flesh does not want to do that! It wants to have a little pity party with a live band!

12.  I have learned and am learning to be confident in my abilities since I’ve started my own freelance business. I have to be confident in myself, my work, and my abilities. As it is true with everyone, you’re your own worst critic, and I cannot be like that in front of people. Or in an email. I have to be 100% confident in my ability to perform a job that I might not feel so confident on. But as one person told me this month, “No job is too big for you!” And I believe her!

13.   This is not something that I learn, but it’s more of an observation that I know God wanted to share with me. I have a great church family here in Cheyenne, Wyoming. I want to brag about these people because they have become very special to me. I have about three Mommas at my church and one dad-like figure in my life. My parents NEVER have to worry about me because God has placed me in good hands. I am blessed to have these women and men in my life because, honestly, without them this year, I have no idea where I would be. I would be in a hopeless state for sure. But these people have constantly prayed for me, supported me, loved on me, and care for me above all words that I could write on here. This is for North Christian Church who has loved on both Nathan and me! I love you guys!

14.  Apparently God is making me a leader of sorts because I am leading an Arts and Crafts group for the military spouses on base as well as leading a Bible study with a friend of mine. I have started my own business and I might be starting a networking group here in Cheyenne (I know, another networking group! Just to give you an idea, I’m in about 5-7 networking groups as it is!)!

God has done A LOT in my life since 2013; I am a completely different person from who I was in 2013. The things I tolerate now, I wouldn’t have in 2013. The way I thought in 2013 is pretty opposite from 2014. I know it is God working in and through me.

I know this year was a hard one, but God has a plan for it. He has equipped me with people who are praying over me, love me, and care about me. He has blessed me richly with finding me clients for January. He has put me in Cheyenne, Wyoming, the least populated state in America, for a reason.

 I know 2015 will show me this reason more and more and I know one thing for sure: God has remained faithful towards me and He will continue to remain faithful.  I know He will continue to grow me in Him and show me His will. 

I am putting a lid – so to speak – on 2014 and eagerly waiting to open the lid of 2015! Happy New Year everyone!

Merry Christmas!

It's here!!!!

This is what you've all been waiting for! I am proud to announce that Monica Writes is taking on a NEW adventure and will be producing monthly video blogs from now on with subjects on inspiring you to grab your dreams!

I will be featuring other people just like you and me and talking about how they got started! I want you to glean from the wisdom of people before you, get ideas, and be inspired!

I decided to start the video blog about myself so you can get to know me a little bit more. From now on, about once a month, I will be posting a video of me interviewing someone on what they do, how they got started, and any tips to give to our viewers - which is YOU!

I couldn't have done this video without the beautiful Luana Krause from Skating Buffalo! Check out her blog as she is a wonderful writer and producer! 

Enjoy the video and Merry Christmas!!

SIDE BAR

 

This is my FIRST White Christmas ever!!!!!!!!!!! We are expected to get between 4-6 inches of snow! I'm blowing up my Facebook with pictures and videos of the snow to all my Georgia relatives. Where I'm from, there will probably never be another White Christmas (I think it snowed on Christmas back when I was a toddler). 

I wanted to share with you some pictures of my little family on this fabulous cold day! Nathan was restless and wanted to take Casey, our dog, to a park. Casey LOVED it and he was running and playing in the snow! So precious! But here are two pictures taken for our pleasure and yours! Merry Christmas!
 

You have probably noticed the “Coming Soon” pictures that have been added to my blog, Facebook, and Twitter. On my social media, you have seen pictures leading up to the BIG day! Each picture stated something along the lines of, “Coming soon!” or a countdown like, “10 more days!” with the background of bricks, a Christmas tree, a stocking, and now a fireplace. What could all this mean?! I know you’ve been anticipating this moment and now it’s only 

ONE DAY AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am very excited about the surprise because I hope it takes off! Not only online, but also in your heart. I want to inspire you, help you see your goals as attainable and not just dreams. I want you to strive to get where you always wanted.

Starting my own freelance business has been a scary adventure because I have to be very confident in my abilities and put myself out there. I also have had to put a lot of time and effort into my business without getting paid. It’s almost worst than an internship. But this has been my dream and I am making it happen with hard work and dedication.

I want you to feel that same way. I want whatever your dreams and goals are to become reality with inspiration and ideas. I know I like hearing things from people like me who have started out from the bottom and have been successful. It makes me know I can make it too.

Everyone needs to know that what they want out of life is attainable even if its spending over half your time working, planning, writing, networking, exposing yourself, going to events, having a booth at craft fairs, and never getting paid for any of it. Our dreams cannot become reality until we work at them, and that’s why I have something special for you.

And who wouldn’t want something inspirational and special on Christmas day? Think of this Christmas as being EXTRA special! Until then, have a wonderful Christmas Eve and I will see you tomorrow for the BIG reveal!

Are you feeling discouraged this Christmas season? Do you just feel runned down, out of gas, exhausted beyond all belief? Do you feel like your life, job, marriage, relationship, or family is all hopeless? It’s even rougher when Christmas is only two days away and the magic is just not there because your soul is in turmoil.

I understand. I am there. I am trying not to get discouraged, but so often I do. I feel like I keep fighting an uphill battle – literally. And this hill has been lasting for MONTHS! When will this hill end?! When am I going to see the other side of this battle?! 

It’s exhausting both mentally and spiritually. 

You’re not alone in this; many people are suffering right now and its stealing their joy.

You may remember that I have been listening to Chip Ingram’s Bible study entitled “Keep Pressing Ahead” and he talks about discouragement. I want to share what I learned from him because it’s powerful, Biblical, and God-given.

One thing Chip says is, “The most formidable enemy every Christ-follower faces in fulfilling God’s will for their lives is discouragement.” 

Am I a Christ-follower? Check. Am I trying to fulfill God’s will in my life? Check. Am I facing discouragement? Check. 

Sounds like we should expect discouragement, much like adversity (which you can read that here).

He goes on to list the four causes of discouragement and you may find yourself facing one or more of these causes.

1.      Loss of strength, which equals fatigue.

2.      Loss of vision or focus. This could mean focus on life, marriage, or any other obstacle.

3.      Loss of confidence and faith

4.      Loss of security, which is the same as facing fear

I feel like I’m dealing with a little bit of all four, with an emphasis of number 4. Whatever discouragement you are facing and whatever cause of loss you’re dealing with, there is hope. For Chip goes on about how to get out of discouragement (and I’m preaching to the choir (ahem, myself) right now, just so you know).

He entitles this as the “Four resources to overcome discouragement”.

1.      Be proactive and get moving! James 2:17, “Thus also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.” Meaning: Remember who God is. 

One thing I have learned about David is when he wrote about the Psalm, he poured his heart out to God. He would cry out, “My enemies surround me! They are waiting to kill me! Save me, O God!” Then the next verse, David is PRAISING God and REMEMBERING who He is. Look at the Psalm for yourself if you’re doubting this. David will one moment have a pity party for himself, full of discouragement and doubt, and the next, he’s singing praises to God and praising His name.

I believe this is what Chip is talking about. When we get discouraged, we need to be proactive about remembering who God is. We need to remember what He has done for us. Recall a time that God saved you from a tragic accident or gave you a special moment that will last forever with your spouse or any other family member. 

Those are the moments to remember because it’s important to remember God’s faithfulness towards us. I am the worst at remembering what God has done for me in the past because I get so wrapped up in the present and future that I can’t focus on what God has done. Don’t be like me; be proactive because your faith is still working even when it’s discouraged.

2.      Remember WHO is for me! “For with God nothing will be impossible” - Luke 1:37. 

If you and I are God’s children, then NOTHING is impossible for our God! I was reading the Bible the other day and I came across Ephesians 3:20, “Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us.” He IS able to do EXCEEDINGLY and ABUNDANTLY above anything we can think or ask! He created the entire universe! If you need to be reminded about how great and mighty our God is, then watch’s Louie Giglio’s “How Great Is Our God” video here.

Getting back on subject, God is for us, then who can be against us (Romans 8:31)?! Do not cave! Continue to fight! Stay strong in God’s Word and remember Who fights before us! 

3.      FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! 2 Timothy 4:7-8, “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.  Finally, there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give to me on that Day, and not to me only but also to all who have loved His appearing.”

When we fight the good fight, when we are discouraged but still choose to be proactive in our faith and remember Who is on our side, then that earn us kudo points in heaven! One day, we will go to our retirement home and Jesus says, “You have fought the good fight. Now come and enjoy My presence!” We want that, don’t we? We want Jesus to be proud of us when He knows the struggle we went through!

In Romans 12:1, “Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.” This reminds me that people are watching us Christians. But the glory of it all is that one day when someone we know who doesn’t believe falls into discouragement, and during our time of discouragement, if we chose to fight discouragement with the Word of God and through faith, they will remember how we dealt with our discouragement and may come and ask how we survive our hell. That is when we can share our faith and Jesus to them.

4.      Never fight alone! Get connected! Hebrews 3:13, “ but exhort one another daily, while it is called “Today,” lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin.”

I believe this is a very important concept. We were not meant to fight ALONE. We were meant to be a community. Tenth Avenue North puts this concept in such a awesome way with their song, “No Man is an Island”, which you can watch here.

When we are going through discouragement, we need to have someone who is in the Word daily and someone who we trust to give us encouragement that comes straight from the mouth of God. I have two mentors who I can turn to and trust. I know when I go to them, they are not going to preach the world to me, they are going to preach the Word of God to me. I know I am growing thanks to them. They have done a world of good for me because I feel like I would truly be lost without their wisdom, help, and guidance.

I IMPLORE you to find a mentor or someone you can go to and talk about your discouragement. This person should lead you back to the Word of God and tell you what God says. This is the community and the exhortation that God is talking about in His Word and in the song by Tenth Avenue North.

Before I leave you, here is one quote from Jeremy Kingsley in his book, “Getting Back Up When Life Knocks You Down”, that will help us gain perspective about discouragement:

“In a mysterious way, our troubles allow us to discover and develop reservoirs of strength and preference that most of us don’t realize we have. When we lean on the Lord, He actually uses our struggles to expand our ability to deal with them. It’s a process that leads us to greater hope and a deeper faith.”

Please, go back through the resources to overcome discouragement. God’s Word is there to help us remember who He is and how much He loves and cares for us. And He will send you a person to love you and encourage you when the discouragement comes rushing in. And above all, our Lord Jesus is using our struggle to expand our hope and faith in Him.

You’re not alone. The God of the universe is right there with you. He loves you deeply and He wants you to lean on Him. What a great God we serve! 

May your day be brighter and more filled as you continue to walk in faith and hope.

Ps: If you would like to listen to this sermon, click here and scroll down to “Facing DiscouragementPart 1 and 2”. (Note: It was on the second page at this time)